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10 Tips for Handling Conflict

14/6/2011

13 Comments

 
Conflict is a situation where people have contrasting feelings, needs, perceptions and interests. It often occurs when people feel they are losing something they value. This could be anything from material to immaterial possessions, such as ideals, standards, aspirations, reputation, status or self esteem. 
 
As a project manager you are more than likely to come across situations of difficulty and conflict. The more complex and high profile your project is, the higher the likelihood may be. Disagreements can arise between a group of stakeholders and yourself, or it may be that several stakeholders disagree between them and that your role becomes that of a mediator. In some cases your stakeholders would have already worked together elsewhere, and any personal disputes between them could flare up as political clashes on your project. 

Disagreements are likely to arise as a consequence of unexpected changes on your project, or during the initiation phase, when the foundations have to be agreed upon. It could relate to anything from the project’s goals, objectives and success criteria to scope, requirements, solution or approach. Later in the project, conflict can arise when constraints and agreements are breached, such as budget, time or quality. 
  
Remember however, that conflict is not necessarily bad. Sometimes a situation can only really be uncovered by getting all opposing emotions, opinions and views out into the open. Be resourceful and calm, and diplomatically deal with the situation before it escalates out of control. 

In situations of conflict, seek to use to following tips;

 1. Do not pre-judge the situation. Become aware of your own emotions and interests and open your mind to the fact that you could be the one who is wrong.

2. Take on the role of a mediator even if you are an active part of the conflict. Listen, speak and carry yourself the way a respected mediator would.

3. Where possible negotiate with people in isolation in stead of letting a conflict flare up at a meeting. No one likes to come across badly in a forum so give people a chance to resolve the conflict before the meeting.

4. Do not attack, blame or defend anyone. See both sides of the situation. As the mediator your role is to calm the situation down and invite to rational thinking.
 
5. Identify the root cause of the disagreement and get all parties to agree to what the underlying problem is. Focus all discussions and conversations on the way forward. 

6. Make a BIG effort to listen and understand the other parties. Assess what their underlying fears, motives and aims are.

7. Only speak up about your own views once you fully understand the
other’s position. This will help you identify mutual grounds and build respect around you as a person.
 
8. Summarize everyone’s position as accurately as you can. Use vocabulary such as “I understand” and repeat the exact words and phrases which each party is using. 

9. Make people feel good and look good by taking their interests into account.

10. Maintain an open and positive mind throughout and aim to find a resolution which works for everyone; not a compromised agreement, but an expansive win-win solution which is better than either party had thought of when the conflict started.


If you liked this post, you may also like:
6 principles for building trusting and lasting relationships with your stakeholders
Create a Highly Motivated Team 
My Story - Working Smarter; Not Harder  
Delegate Effectively and Thouhtfully

13 Comments
Himanshu Bansal link
28/7/2011 16:32:00

I have seen that summarizing conflicts in writing is a good way. You can use a white board or a notepad to write everyone's point. This way a PM or a mediator can clearly articulate.

Everyone should be given a chance to speak. If the situation is volatile then conflicting persons or parties should only be allowed to talk to moderator. Once moderator feels that situation is not so volatile only then conflicting parties should address each other.

Lastly, after such meeting there should be action items to resolve any outstanding items.

Reply
Steve Wilheir link
16/9/2011 15:45:28

The bulk of the conflict situations I've seen result from a miscommunication -- a misinterpretation of someone's intent or even their words. It's amazing how when I've abstracted what was meant from what was said as a mediator, that the conflict melts away.

- Steve
http://Twitter.com/ganttguru

Reply
os windows xp link
17/6/2013 02:57:20

Brilliant blog! The blog contents are really valuable and you had done a great home work to portrait such beautiful ideas as well as informative ones. I sincerely thank you for the efforts you have put in creating such wonderful postings. Thanks for the share. A readers’ paradise!

Reply
Susanne Madsen link
17/6/2013 03:31:12

My pleasure!

Susanne

Reply
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24/7/2013 11:23:37

10 Tips for Handling Conflict will provide you the possibility to find the approach for the solution of any issue. This is a considerable solution in personal communication as for individuals though for the society. Thank you a lot for sharing it with us.

Reply
YachtBooker link
25/7/2013 01:56:26

I would like to thank you for your nicely written post, its informative and your writing style encouraged me to read it till end

Reply
online casino link
25/7/2013 08:32:13

These 10 Tips for Handling Conflict are brilliant for those who wants to find the solution and a the right approach for any difficult situation. They are perfect for easily performing. Thank you a lot for sharing with us.

Reply
Daria Kobuszko
21/6/2015 12:55:51

I' m really happy that I can read such a briliant post;) Many people who are Project Managers should read it. Most of them have big problems with find the causes of problems or they dont see the problem. Most of them dont have enough knowledge about handling conflicts... Its really good lecture;) thanks a lot for sharing with us ;)

Reply
Sylvester Chigbu
21/6/2015 13:01:34

As an IT leader I am often confronted with conflicts within team members and across stakeholder boundaries. Your article reinforces the importance of mastering the art of listening.

Reply
Vasishta bhargava
21/6/2015 18:38:38

Conflict resolution methods presented in this article cover most situations when planning, implementing or auditing or closing the projects, while for most situations it works very well, however,
-----
the points 4 & 6 contradict to large extent in practical cases when someone/something which is not a position to stop talking or listening at the point of discussion, for several reasons. This usually might happen at what stage the conflict has occurred & its probable extension during the course of the project.

Secondly point # 6, making a BIG effort may sound to be easier said than done in practical situations. Given the time constraints associated with the project deliverable, & further steps in the project, in most situations, are quite demanding for both project manager who is responsible to the organization & its clientele.

Are there any additional or alternative method for this point, to make the situation better than before in easier way.

Reply
George Ekanem
22/6/2015 09:27:24

Wonderful write up. Inspiring thanks for mentorship/coaching.

Reply
Marianne link
22/6/2015 12:29:03

Good article.
Use clear communication.
Make sure you have been understood and that you have understood the others.
Deal with the issue(s) and not the person(s)
Ask the persons involved how they would like to solve the conflict.
Let one person speak and finish what (s)he wants to say.

Reply
australianbaccaratonline link
21/5/2020 00:51:09

Wonderful write up. Inspiring thanks

Reply

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